The Bastards Want To Kill Cats

Once again, one of Heart's kids is involved in rescuing some animals. This time, it's the feral cats at JFK airport. You can get the full story over at Heart's blog, including what you can do to help should you choose. I am personally asking for your help. You know that I have had cats for years. I also don't like killing living things, animals, people, whatever. Heart's post is called S.O.S. I appreciate your help! Thank you so much, regardless of where you live.

Goodies To Share

Lately I have been reading Wng's A Whole New G which I find delightful. Wng is pretty thoughtful, and also funny, which naturally makes me think of my good buddy, friend, pal Pool. No one is quite like Franki, or Odat, who are in their own Class. Then you have Glamourpuss and Hearts who each craft their own magnificent wordsmith orbits, recently joined by Skinny Little Blond. SLB wrote a piece called 40 Years & Still Learning that was so good and so natural that I have singled it out for you. If you appreciate great writing from someone who has something to say, and says it really well, you have a new blog to read. And if you wanted proof of a Supreme Source, Crankster is publishing again. Mana from heaven for me! And once again, I am addicted to Nosjunkie's (Lee's) blog Vicinity of Obcinity. I look forward to reading her stuff daily. I intend to share my Rocking Girl Blogger Award with her. She deserves it! So here's a few people for you to look at. Enjoy.

Work Is Not A Four Letter Word

When you first meet someone, part of your conversation will generally drift into the subject area of what you both do for a living. The work that you do is perhaps the most important trait that describes who you are. The vast majority of people may well recoil from that statement. You will hear a lot of things that people think is a description of them. I am the father of three children, we live at 2314 Terrace Rd with my wife Jill, I drive a Cadillac Seville. One day, Jill files for a divorce, they no longer live together, he loses custody of his children and the house, and he can no longer afford the Seville.

Personal identifiers that tend to stick with us are the skills we develop for ourselves. When you first start off in school, your teachers and a lot of the testing is oriented at finding out what talents you have. It takes a lot of work and discipline to develop real skills, like real math skills, or critical thinking skills. One of the tragedies that happens is that some kids find school too easy, and never learn good study skills. Not everyone actually fully develops their talent and uses what they have available to them for a variety of reasons. A lack of opportunity, the kid who goes to work at sixteen or younger because of the death of a parent, lots of things can get in the way of someone not getting to either develop nor live up to their potential. Some folks simply don't make the effort, and it does involve taking risks, getting out of your comfort zone, so to speak.



The guy above is Abraham Maslow, the Psychologist that many people have heard of but most people never read. His work has been re-written, summarized, and made easier by so many people that it is astonishing. One author re-wrote Maslow for the entire business community telling them that needs were satisfied in the hierarchy like filling a bucket with water. Food, sex, etc are level 1 needs. Would all of you who have either eaten enough for the rest of your life, and/or had enough sex for the rest of your life please let the rest of us know in the comments below. I trust I have made my point. To be a bit more precise, the first three levels, I'm going to call the third level Social, which is how I learned it, recur as needs a lot. They are maintenance needs.



If you read Herzberg's "Motivator Hygiene Theory" he calls the first three levels of Maslow's Hierarchy Hygiene needs, and he hopes that people get to wallow in hygiene. The top two level of the hierarchy, Self-Esteem and Self-Actualization are called Motivators by Herzberg. You can go all the way back to Kennedy's work at Harvard in the late 50's where he describes the Motives of Human Beings as affiliation (being with others), power (affecting what others do), and achievement (taking in risk and anxiety and reducing it). A lot of technical talk that correspond to affiliation and power being level 3 skills, and achievement being a level 4 skill, on the other side of the dividing line. In other words, you need to risk to achieve. It's the easiest trait to condition OUT of human beings, taking risks, so achievement is the hardest thing to get from a lot of people. Others, get hooked on the Kool Aid of Achievement. Those Nobel winning professors in research universities teach that one course because they have to, not because they want to do it. They are hooked on research at the riskiest level, big time University level research. It's not for the faint of heart.

I have said a lot, and I may have lost a lot of you. I gave you a lot of psychological underpinnings to understand a situation that has really bothered me a lot for quite a while. I retired October 15, 1999 at a pretty early age. The market fell apart in the year 2000 while I was in Alaska, and really self-destructed in 2001. In my field, I had been gone too long to get back in. I was technologically obsolete.And then I started getting the age thing. And I realized that I wasn't as happy as I could be. Some one I found quite by accident, who is now on the blogroll, Skinny Little Blond, wrote a post last Friday called "Do Whatever You Want" which is one of the best existential stories I have ever read. And, she's a lot easier to read than Sartre, besides, Sartre's characters always seem to rush towards anxiety. But, I digress. I have sent several thousand resumes and applied to more positions than I care to admit. I have been trying to get a business started in a slowing economy. I have made a small living trading in the markets.

Last Monday, my broker walked up to the house, with the broken driveway, walkway, and garage floor, and he offered me a partnership in his new firm. He was in the top 10 at Morgen Stanley and he left to form a Wealth Management practice. He could have had any of the brokers at his old firm, or a lot of other firms, plus the support staff he had at Morgen. He picked me. He didn't even have my resume. He has known me since 1988. I am the second person in the firm. I have my keys already, tomorrow, I have to be fingerprinted, and cleared legally and financially. Neither will be a problem. I get to work with the Raymond James Trading Systems, and the first time I saw them, my mouth dropped open. I have so much to do......

I intend to publish as time permits. But suddenly, I have Level 4 and 5 needs that have been suffering, to attend to, so I'm going to go to sleep now so I can get up early and go to work!!!! More later!

The Stages of Committed Relationships

My friend the therapist sent this and I thought I'd share it. It was produced at The Relationship Institute and I leave their name there so they get the appropriate credit.


The Relationship Institute

When attempting to create a loving, healthy intimate relationship, it is important to have an accurate roadmap for the journey. Most of our culture's roadmaps have emphasized fantasy, illusion and denial, and those who follow those maps will tend to have unhappy, conflict-ridden relationships. What follows is a reality-based roadmap which comes from research into couples' actual experiences of being in long-term relationships.
While theorists disagree on the exact name and number of the stages couples progress through, there is a general consensus that couples go through some version of the following stages. Not everyone goes through all the stages and some couples may go through them in a different sequence, but for most couples this is the normative experience in a long-term committed relationship.

1. ROMANTIC LOVE
This is the love that Hollywood loves to promote as the only kind of love. Romantic love is wonderful, easy, and effortless. It is very spontaneous and alive. The feelings and perceptions that go through both people are that we are one; we are the same. You are perfect. I can give and receive love with little or no effort required. There is a tremendous emphasis on maximizing similarities and minimizing differences. There is a belief and expectation that you will provide most or all of my wants, needs, desires. There is generally a high degree of passion and feelings and expressions of romance come easily and often. The partners think about each other constantly, and make much eye contact and are very affectionate when they are together. Many people experience this as living in a state of near-constant bliss and infatuation. There is a belief that these feelings and experiences will go on forever, that 'we will never disagree on anything', and that somehow fate or forces larger than themselves have brought them together.

This stage generally lasts from six months to two years, and is the SHORTEST stage of any of the stages of long-term committed relationships.

2. ADJUSTING TO REALITY
Ah, reality. Inevitably, predictably, eventually, reality rears its (ugly?) head and the bubble bursts on the Romantic stage. Sometimes it is a slow leak, other times a sudden and complete blowout. But either way, something happens which causes a minor or major conflict in the new relationship. Sometimes the trigger is living together and having to share household chores and experiencing personal habits up close. Sometimes it is an act of deception which is discovered. Sometimes it is planning a wedding, buying a house, or sharing finances. Whatever the cause, after the conflict occurs, it becomes impossible to continue the fantasy that this person and this relationship are immune from struggle, from effort, from reality. Differences which were previously obscured suddenly become visible. Conflicts, anxieties, disappointment and hurt replace the effortless flow of the Romantic stage. There is a sense that this person is not living up your hopes and dreams, and there is an accompanying loss of closeness. Gradually each person is forced to relinquish some of their most cherished romantic fantasies, or to cling to them desperately in a state of denial.

In this stage, it is common to feel as if someone or something or even Life itself has cheated you or robbed you of something precious, almost like a stage of grieving the loss of something innocent and wonderful. There is a desire to be close again but confusion as how to create that. It is the first time that fears of intimacy begin to arise. Suddenly the couple must learn how to deal with very real differences, how to deal with conflict, and how to integrate being an independent person as well as someone in an intimate relationship.

In short, Adjusting to Reality is the stage where the Real Relationship begins.

3. THE POWER STRUGGLE
As the disillusionment of the Adjusting to Reality stage deepens, the couple tends to have more disagreements. Minor issues blow up into larger arguments. Yelling appears for the first time, if it ever will. Both partners dig in their heels and defend their positions on issues fiercely. Each person digs in their heels and protects their turf. This once-tender effortless loving relationship has become a battleground and evolved into a daily Power Struggle. This is a typical stage in the development of a long-term committed relationship.
For the first time in the relationship, there are occasional or frequent thoughts of leaving the relationship. This person who only recently appeared to be the embodiment of pure love and joy in your eyes suddenly seems self-centered and not to be trusted. Doubts arise as to whether the other person really loves you. There are consistent feelings of ambivalence and anger. Blaming and accusing becomes the most common form of interaction. Each partner is afraid of giving in, and wants the other to change. This is where deep resentments begin to form, which if left unchecked, become the cancer that eventually eats away at all the love and tenderness that has come before. Sarcasm and hostility enter into daily conversations.

This does not have to be the end of the relationship. The tasks for the couple here are to develop problem-solving, conflict resolution and negotiating skills. The conflicts will clearly not go away on their own. Each person much learn to listen respectfully to their partner's position, even if they don't agree with it. They must learn to support their partner's own growth, even if they feel it compromises their own. They may see the origins of the patterns of their conflicts (and their dysfunctional ways of resolving them) in their family of origin.

4. RE-EVALUATION
The Power Struggle is physically and emotionally draining, and if the couple can survive, they move into the next stage, of a conscious Re-Evaluation of the relationship. Whereas the original commitment one makes is typically based on projections of fantasy, this Re-Evaluation takes into account the reality and fears and defenses of each person. Do I really want to stay with this person? You know who this person is now, you know their limitations, and you know the range of which they are capable of improving or getting better. Knowing all that, do you still want to stay? That is the question that gets answered during this stage.

Both people tend to turn outward to resolve their issues, instead of toward each other. As a result, fears of abandonment come up strongly here. Can I make by myself? Am I really okay the way I am? Will anyone else find me attractive or appealing?

Both people emotionally (and sometimes physically) disengage and withdraw during this stage, which makes it the stage in which separation, divorce and/or an affair are most likely to occur. Feelings of resentment are less intense in this stage, as the affect in the relationship is likely to be very flat and empty. The sexual relationship sporadic at best and more likely non-existent. Things are ripe for an affair to burst on the scene, and often a person in this stage will begin to confide in someone of the opposite sex. This confidante will take on more and more importance in the person's life, due to their neediness and vulnerability, and they will often get emotionally very involved without consciously realizing it. At this point even the slightest affection is like throwing a match in the forest on a hot summer day, and a passionate, intense affair will begin.

The danger is that when an affair begins at this stage, it is almost impossible for the relationship to recover. The primary relationship has too little going for it in the way of gratification on either side, and the inevitable comparisons between the affair and the relationship seem like night and day.

A separation can be useful here to help each person gain perspective, due that too can lead to the demise of the relationship if outside gratifications seem to dwarf the emptiness of the relationship.

The task for each person here is to stay present and honor their commitment, develop individually and be able to see their partner as a separate person. This is the only way the relationship can survive and move into the next stage.

5. RECONCILIATION
In this stage, after the distance of the Re-evaluation, if the relationship has survived, there is a re-awakening of interest in getting closer and connecting again. Knowing all that they know, coming from reality and not fantasy, there is a decision to have the willingness to try once again. There is an open acceptance of the conflicts and differences in the relationship, but they are approached with a different attitude: they are used as opportunities for learning about oneself and the other person. They are catalysts for growth and change. There is a recognition that the differences are real and won't go away, and that neither person can really change the other. Thus begins a process of struggling to create an honest, genuine intimate relationship. The people connect again and the relationship again begins to produce ongoing satisfaction for both partners.
In this stage there is also a deeper sense of taking responsibility for one's part in conflict and in lack of satisfaction. Each person may recognize the link between what they learned as children in their families of origin and how they approach intimate

relationships. They own their distortions and projections onto their partners. They begin to see their partner as they see themselves, as a somewhat flawed yet decent person who is making a sincere effort to love and be close and still take care of their own needs.
There is a deeper acceptance in this stage that any relationship cannot and will not save you in any sense. You still have your own individual needs and issues and they does not go away just because you are in a relationship. But the part of your life that can be nurtured and shared in a loving, accepting relationship is also real and in this stage each person looks to the other for that connection. The war is over, the conflicts are accepted, and there is a sincere desire to learn how to work through the issues to a satisfying resolution.

6. ACCEPTANCE
The final stage in a committed relationship, which researchers estimate less than 5% of couples ever reach, is one of complete Acceptance. There is an integration of the need of the self and the needs of the relationship. Each person takes responsibility for their own needs, for their own individual lives, and also for providing support for their partner. A high level of warmth is present. The couple is able to maintain a balance between autonomy and union. Conflicts still arise on occasion, but as a result of the struggles of the previous stage, the couple has figured out how to resolve most conflicts relatively quickly. Resentments are few. There are few surprises: these are people who know one another and know what to expect. They accept what they are getting, with no denial or fantasy involved. They work together as a team to stay connected and also maintain their own identities.

These are the six stages that most couples go through during a long-term committed relationship. While not every couple goes through every stage or in that exact sequence, nonetheless this roadmap, based on the research on actual couples' experiences of intimate relationship, still provides the best roadmap we have available for charting the most likely path of an long-term committed relationship. And if we have a roadmap, we can chart the healthiest and least disruptive path to the goal of a fulfilling, intimate relationship.

Does this help you understand your relationship? Is it useful to you? Should I keep putting these out for you to read?

Blogging That Hits The Mark

One of my best advisers, the trend setting sous chef My Reflecting Pool has decided in her infinite wisdom (never ending wisdom, just like the Great State of Maryland, and several others too) that I deserved this award. I am honestly and truly flattered, thank you so much.

I am nominating Odat, who hits the mark every single day, without fail. Odat is the operational definition of Excellence and Quality, traits I hold dear.

I am nominating Heart in San Francisco for her superb writing, her creative imagination and her Excellence and Quality.

I am nominating Nosjunkie (Lee) because I am becoming addicted to her blog, and South Africa, and to what she stands for, in my words, Excellence and Quality.

I am nominating James Burnett because of his continuing Excellence and Quality in his blog.

And finally, I am nominating a blogger on a temporary hiatus, because CMHL is the epitome of Excellence and Quality.

You all have a great day!

Dediated to Echomouse

Echomouse is someone that I care about. This shouldn't surprise anyone. This has turned out to be a really bad year for her. After long illnesses, she first lost her father, then her mother.
For those of you who have not yet suddenly found yourself to be an orphan, let me explain to you that no matter what your marital status, if you had anything but the most horrible relationship with your parents, the realization can be terrible. If you are married with children, you have a lot to hang onto. No children leaves you empty. Being single.....Echomouse has family, brothers I believe.

Last December, she wrote a post and used the video below. I snatched it, for use in the future. She wrote a post today called Life and talked a little about working in the garden. She ended by talking about her sick friend out West. I should mention that Echomouse is physically ill herself.

If you read a lot of existentialism, you come to realize that hugging, like sex, is critically important because it gives one the illusion of being connected to another human being and helps one deal with the terrible isolation of being alone. We can certainly hug a lot more people than we can have sex with.

I urge you to go to Echomouse's blog and leave her a comment telling her that there's a video here, dedicated to her. Hell, I got it from her. And leave her a hug while you're there. {{{Echomouse}}}. Doesn't hurt a bit! Give it a try and see if you like it! It's a far, far better thing you do ......

Blogger Community

"When I find myself in times of trouble Mother Mary comes to me speaking words of wisdom, let it be, let it be". Nope, it wasn't CMHL who said that, nor was it Hearts, someone else I listen to for what she has to say. So when my coffee pot broke on Wednesday, I was already well beyond the limits of human endurance, and to make matters worse, we were out of food. Literally. I can always go out and buy a sandwich, but I make my own coffee. Starbucks just doesn't make it strong enough. So I mix either one of their bold or extra bold coffees with some of their espresso, about three to one. If I drink their espresso straight, I use a double batch. Claudia has told me of the joys of Cuban espresso, but I have never found any so far. I take good coffee as seriously as Glamourpuss takes a good cup of tea, maybe more serious than that. I used to use a Chemex System so I was sure I had boiling water to put into the ground coffee in the filter. Don't get me wrong, I don't consider myself a gourmet of coffee. You''ll never find me in a Starbucks tasting room sipping coffee, and then spitting it out and judging the flavor. Not happening. I am a coffee gourmand. I drink it in quantity, and I swallow every last drop. I make a 10 cup pot, and drink it. And these people who say I can't put cream or Splenda or high quality hot chocolate mix in my coffee, please, you have a better chance of talking me into Capital Punishment. Please don't waste my time. I am not a coffee snob, I am a coffee drinker. Please stand back and don't get hurt.

Which brings me to the current issue. The Community Blogger Award. Glamourpuss was handing out awards to various people. The first one was the "Totally Fabulous Award" and I knew from Puss' description that at my satirical best, I was never going to qualify. Puss wrote "...but I’m also rather good at some other stuff, like coordinating my accessories with my outfit, parallel parking, and giving blow jobs. So hurrah for me." I want to be absolutely clear here. I can parallel park! And, I prefer to accessorize by wearing brown shoes with a pair of black pants and a white shirt. But, it definitely stops there. I stick to women, my wife prefers it that way. I even used to have a pink shirt although lately I have been wearing a lot of inherited golf polo shirts from Greg Norman, etc.

I was awarded a Community Blogger Award! Thank You.

There are people I would like to commune with over a cup of coffee, a beer, a cocktail, lunch, whatever. Mostly they are in my blogroll. So please, count yourself among those I mean.

I am going to mention a few people like Odat because I have never been able to give her anything, and she stands in a unique place among bloggers with her really positive, uplifting blog. Odat, One Day At A Time is the very essence of Positive Affirmation, and is a daily rejuvenation of the human spirit. I won't tell you more about Odat, or why I think she does this, but missing out on her is the silliest thing you can do.

Equally silly is not reading every word that Heart in San Francisco writes. Her command of the language and her ability to convey with precision is so far beyond my meager ability that there are times I have just read what she has written and sat and thought about it for a while. Some pieces are a bit deeper than others, and I have thought for a day or two. Some I pass on. I have disagreed with her, and I once wrote sort of quietly about Barry Bonds. Very quietly as the issue was easily one of small detail as opposed to the major point. But, I digress.

James Burnett is in mourning, and I won't disturb him now. Someone is going to say, "...but he's a professional writer" and I'm going to say ".....there's a lot of professional writers I can't stand!" I don't always agree with James Burnett, but I certainly miss his writing right now, and I miss it a lot.

I only wish Crankster was employed already because I miss him too. Crankster is someone I met in real life, and my relationship with him in real life is even better than in the blogosphere. But, when you are looking for work, and you are raising a little one, and lots of things are happening, you don't always have time. So, I really miss Crankster a lot too.

And finally, I miss Mist tremendously. Enormously. The World knows about me and Alison and CMHL. She's my blog sister and CMHL is, well CMHL. I 'found' Mist on Ali's site, and went there. It is from Mist's site that I met almost everyone that comes here, like Wandering Girl. Mist has been among the longest readers I have had. she gave me advice when I was starting, and has been a wonderful friend.

I guess that there's just a lot of you that I give a damn about. You'll all just have to suffer with that.

I Could Use A Vacation, Some Drugs, and a Martini

First things first. Lee or Nosjunkie, or however she wants to play it, of Vicinity of Obcinity is looking for new people to read her blog. I actually like reading her blog. I recommend you try it. If this sounds a little strange coming from me, please read on. I have been a little strained lately, so Lee, I apologize.

This weekend, we unveiled my nephew's head stone at the cemetery, and it was a pretty miserable day on Sunday. The last time I had a year like this was 1993, and I burned the damn calendar on New Year's Eve. I may use a Burnzomatic Blow torch this year plus 6 pounds of C4 explosives at this rate, not that I have an opinion, mind you.

Well, after more than 30 years, the concrete had cracked on the driveway, and had started to crack in the garage. We went through the process of interviewing contractors, getting bids, talking, doing the whole deal. We took our time. We picked the second most expensive contractor who promised a turn-key solution.

We expected them in September. No one came or called. We called the office. They promised to call back. No one called. We finally got a start date. October 15th. Not quite September. The Project Manager finally came out to survey the job the Friday before at 4 PM.

Monday morning, at 8:00 am, no one showed up. We got a call. The project manager called in sick, the men would be there at 3:00 PM and start work. At 1:00 PM the men showed up, and worked until 2:00 PM. Tuesday morning, the men showed up at 8:00 am and started right in. tree limbs were cut, concrete was broken, and I went to t'ai chi. At 2:00 PM the door bell rang, and the City Inspector's announced to me that they had condemned the garage.



Above is what the garage looks like now. The salesman called and wanted to know who had called the City? Like I called the City? I spent an hour dealing with the City Inspector getting them to agree that when the contractors showed up with the required structural engineer to show that what they were doing would be satisfactory, that they would be issued a counter permit, no hassle, no waiting. $75. And the salesman is hassling me that the City is trying to stick him up for money that he shouldn't have to pay. I finally lost it. I was screaming. Judy told him that we expected a structural engineer from the beginning, and we certainly has=d asked about that, and the permits, and that we expected the job to be finished for the agreed upon price. I was still screaming. I have no idea what I was screaming either, nor did I care. I still don't. I have had it.



Just in case you couldn't read what it said, that is stuck on *my* garage. I am not quite ready for prime time yet. I'm actually pretty pissed off. Any good suggestions? Like going to M@'s and breathing the air for a while?

We Don't Age, We Improve

This is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by an eighty-six year old
woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in
the New York Times.



Dear Sir:

I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire pension, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight years. You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account of thirty dollars by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank. My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways.

I noticed that whereas I personally answer your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, aceless entity which your bank has become. From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person. My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.

Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an application form which I require your chosen employee to complete. I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative. Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a notary public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof.

In due course, at MY convenience, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that it cannot be shorter than twenty-eight digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service. As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Let me level the playing field even further. When you call me, press buttons
as follows:

IMMEDIATELY AFTER DIALING, PRESS THE STAR (*) BUTTON FOR ENGLISH

#1. To make an appointment to see me

#2. To query a missing payment.

#3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.

#4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping

#5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.

#6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home

#7. To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is
required. Password will be communicated to you at a later date to that
Authorized Contact mentioned earlier.

#8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.

#9. To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put on
hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service.

#10. This is a second reminder to press* for English. While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement. May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous New Year?

Your Humble Client


(Remember: This was written by an eighty-six year old woman) 'you just need to love "SENIORS" !!!!! (We'll all be SENIORS one day, some of us sooner than others)

And remember; Don't make old people mad. They don't like being old in the
first place, so it doesn't take much to set them off.

Shit Happens

I have heard from one or two of you about 'what happened' in the last couple of days. Well, a lot of bad shit happened. People doing pissy things. Billing companys threatening to take me to court over bills I don't owe, other people who were supposed to be long term friends....... that kind of pissy shit.

I suppose I should really get it off my chest and write to someone, but Freud said that bitching is just tension reduction, and you still have to solve a problem. If you want to feel bad, you can feel bad because you thought you had a friend and found out you didn't, that you had a relationship based on someone else's need, and nothing else. We all are in relationships that have some level of need satisfaction involved. No biggie. Still, no one likes feeling used.

So, we revert to the CMHL model of "Light a Candle Don't Curse The Darkness Model". The woman has a deep, insightful view of human behavior. How lucky to find out this early before things got really serious! Things could have been so much worse, and besides, look around you at all the friends you do have!

I'm not going to complain. I got up this morning, and while I don't live in New York, and fly to Paris every other weekend (evidently the standard for a perfect life, I suspect the food is part of it, I might have to take my good friend, buddy pal Franki who speaks French to help out with the food and the art) I'm still ahead of the game. So when I wake up in the morning, I can start off with Odat, and then when I finish laughing, I can read everyone else's blog! Anyone got anything else to contribute?

In No Particular Order

Today we celebrate Columbus Day in the United States because as any school child can tell you, Columbus discovered the United States. I mean, they DID name Columbus Circle in uptown New York after him, didn't they? Below, on the highly detailed map showing Columbus' route, that Columbus NEVER GOT CLOSE TO NEW YORK. He got close to Florida perhaps. I am not going to mention Amerigo Vespucci's name here, but perhaps you might think about it. The Stock Market is open today, the Bond Market is closed. Go figure. Happy Columbus Day y'all, and Happy Shopping!



Which brings me to a bona fide holiday in one of my all time favorite places on Earth, Canada!










Today is Thanksgiving Day in Canada, and I am thankful for Canada. Judy and I started camping across Canada in the 70's. We drove North and entered through Niagara Falls. We drove West across Canada seeing lots of small towns and just having fun. We finally came out in Detroit. We have also spent time in Calgary, Montreal, I learned to ski at a place called Grey Rocks north of Montreal, we have camped in Banff, and I'd love to go back almost any time.

I am thankful for Canada because she exports more oil to this country than any other two countries combined. She exports more wood products than anyone else. We buy a huge amount from Canada, we depend on her for a lot.

But personally, it's the friends I, and we all have in Canada that count the most. Thanks, y'all! Your National Anthem, at your National Sport! And if you look below, you can make out Echomouse's truck.

In Summary

I left the following note for Odat, and it seems to summarize exactly where I am at the moment.


I woke up breathing.

Company left successfully.

All is well, and there's still chocolate on the planet.

I'm a little cranky and I need a nap.

Thank you, Odat.

Monty

I'll see you all when I wake up.

Monty 2

A Little Help Please

Everyone is asleep except me, so I am going to sneak a quickie out here. I consider this to be REALLY IMPORTANT. Hearts has a daughter in Los Angeles that is trying to save a misunderstood 20 year old Arabian horse from being neglected to death. No money is required. Just a little effort.

So please go to Heart's Calling All Animal Lover's Post on her superbly written, award-winning blog "Guilty With An Explanation" where you can normally get a laugh and some wonderful commentary action.

Animals are sentient beings, just like we are. They are completely dependent on use when we bring them under our care. When we stop providing it, they have no alternative. I ask if there is any one of us who has ever been misunderstood? Thank God it didn't cost us our life. Thank you.

Monty

A Temporary Visitor

We have a friend who is coming from California later today (Tuesday) and she will be staying with us through the weekend. We're going to be showing her around on the possibility that she might be moving here or New Jersey in the foreseeable future.

Lots to talk about when I resume publishing next week. In the meantime, y'all do good, and enjoy as much as you can! They said today that the credit crunch is pretty much over!

Time for chocolate! Anyone celebrating?

Life Is A Learning Journey

It's Monday morning, and it might be a good time for a quick review. I got the idea from Odat, and the information from my friend the therapist. It's quick, easy, lots of pictures, and it's easy. You'll find a really neat review here.

Now don't you feel better? Rejuvenated! Ready to go out and do great things. go get 'em! Make things happen. Have a great day!